Don't Fence Me In

One of the lessons from The Twelve Rules for Being human is:

4.  A lesson is repeated until learned. - A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it then you can go on to the next lesson.

Sometimes I forget to learn this.   It brings with it painful consequences.  At other times I am not even aware that I am failing the "lesson".  It sure sticks around though and hangs in the air like a wasp.  I often think I can "outlast" or exhaust the lesson, instead I end up being completely exhausted.

I finally surrender to what I am being asked to do.

Gary Zukav writes in his book, "Spiritual Partnership":

"When you are unaware of your choices, you remain in fear. When you are aware of your fear, you are able to choose differently.  You are able to inject consciousness into an otherwise unconscious process and change it."

He also speaks of the resistance to the lesson:

"The rubber meets the spiritual road when you are furious, want to withdraw emotionally, cannot get out of bed in the morning, or stop eating, thinking critical thoughts, shopping, or watching pornography and you face what you are feeling (experience the painful sensations in your energy centers) and challenge it instead of indulging it.  When you stop before you act habitually (compulsively or addictively) and experience what you are feeling, you enter the dragon's lair.  When you respond instead of react, you engage the dragon directly, and the more its power over you diminishes until it disappears."

I can, at most times hear the dragon moving about, but until I engage with it directly the lesson does not begin.  I am inept and awkward at first, but sooner or later I know the dragon is there to show me my weaknesses and I become empowered.

This "fencing me in" feeling is my resistance to what is.  And I remain stuck in the dragons lair.  

But not for long.

 

Comments

[I M Perfect]

Great blog of realization. What I love about your journey, is that once you set your sights upon the latest dragon, you fearlessly engage. Only by facing it will you gain your freedom. You keep slaying the latest dragon that rears its ugly head.

And I didn't now that when you were unaware of your choices you remain in fear. I have had choices now for seven years...even if the choices are between worse and worser....I had a choice.

What I know for sure, is that you grow stronger, freer and more at peace with each dragon that disappears.